


Absent Lovers

by penguingal, Schnaucl (Onetrackmind)



Series: Triangulation [21]
Category: Numb3rs
Genre: Incest, M/M, comment porn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-10-07
Updated: 2007-10-07
Packaged: 2017-11-21 04:41:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/593559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/penguingal/pseuds/penguingal, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onetrackmind/pseuds/Schnaucl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Charlie attends a math conference, leaving Billy and Don alone together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Absent Lovers

Billy sat on the edge of Charlie's bed while Don leaned in the doorway, watching Charlie pack. He was headed out of town for a long weekend, a conference in North Carolina, and Billy had thought that it would be the perfect opportunity for him to get some time alone with Don. That urge had been a persistent itch under his skin for some time now, but he was still keenly aware of the impact it'd have on Charlie.  
  
"Say something, buddy," Don urged quietly, his eyes following Charlie's every movement.  
  
The plan to tell Charlie over dinner about their idea had gone less than well. It wasn't hard to see how much the idea hurt, even though he tried to cover it, and he'd almost immediately excused himself from the table and come upstairs to pack.  
  
"Say?" Charlie said, still moving back and forth between his closet and his suitcase. "What's to say? You'll have a good time, I'm sure."  
  
Billy winced at the bitter note in Charlie's voice, but he refused to let that sway him. He needed this; they needed to be able to do this, or eventually they'd end up right back where they had a couple months ago: two of them needing each other too much to help it and the third hurt and angry when he found out.  
  
Don moved to intercept Charlie on his next pass, taking him by the shoulders and looking directly into his eyes. "Everything will be the same when you get back. I promise you. I'm not going anywhere."  
  
Charlie opened his mouth to say something, but then closed it and simply nodded. He was sure Don believed what he was saying, or at least he'd convinced himself that he did. Charlie wouldn't believe it until he returned. Until then he had to prepare for the possibility that he'd have to let Don and Billy go. He just wanted to be alone right now. But he didn't want to send them away by revealing how much he hurt or how scared he was.  
  
He didn't want to go to his math conference anymore. Didn't want to be around other people. But maybe he could get lost in the math. Maybe math could fill the void. If it could blunt the pain of his mother's dying, surely it could help this.  
  
"It'll be fine. I'll be fine."  
  
Instinctively, Don knew anything he said wouldn't make it better, and knowing him, he'd be more likely to say something stupid and stick his foot way the hell down his throat. Instead he just grabbed Charlie in a tight hug, pulling the clothes out of his hands and tossing them idly toward the bag.  
  
Billy caught the thrown clothes mid-air and started folding them, placing them neatly in the bag for lack of something better to do. He wished he knew how to explain, how to reassure Charlie that his goal was not to break them apart. He was doing this to make their relationship stronger. The last thing he ever wanted to do was hurt one of them.  
  
"I'm sorry," he said quietly, waiting until Charlie's head lifted from Don's shoulder. "I wish I had a way to make this not hurt, a way to reassure you once and for all that Don will be as much yours when you get off that plane on Sunday as he is right now. If there were another way, you know I'd jump at it."  
  
"I know," he said softly. "And I know that you love us. That you aren't trying to break us apart." It would be easier, if he had to let go, if Billy were trying to break them apart. But he knew Billy wasn't trying to take Don from him any more than he was trying to take Don from Billy.  
  
Billy waited for Charlie to do or say something more, but it was Don who eventually reached out to him and drew him in. The three of them stood in the middle of the room with their arms around each other, and Billy could only hope that what they truly felt for each other was enough to keep the darkness at bay.  
  
"How about we help you finish packing and then we all go back to my place? Enjoy each other's company for a little while before we have to be apart?" he suggested softly.  
  
"Okay," Charlie said, still quiet.  
  
Hesitantly, Billy spoke again. "If-if you'd rather just be with Don tonight, I understand," he said softly. He hoped that wouldn't be the case, but he realized it might be the only way Charlie was going to be able to sleep tonight.  
  
Charlie hesitated, then reached out to touch Billy's cheek. "Don's not the only person I'm afraid of losing."  
  
Billy blinked and started to protest that he would never leave him, could never leave either of them, but stopped himself. Words were not what Charlie needed. Turning his head, Billy kissed the inside of Charlie's wrist.  
  
"Come on then, buddy. Let's get you packed," Don said, moving away reluctantly and heading over to the suitcase. He pulled out everything Charlie had rather haphazardly placed in the bag and started refolding and carefully replacing everything.  
  
Charlie helped but mostly let the experienced packers take over. He was still waiting for the other shoe to drop, but he was a little more relaxed than he had been.  
  
When they were all done, Don shouldered Charlie's bag and waited for him to lead the way out of the room. He had a feeling that if he weren't gently pushing that Charlie might not leave at all. Glancing back at Billy, he smiled softly, reaching out to squeeze his hand in reassurance. Don had a vague idea of how hard it had been on Billy to want and need and not feel like he could do a thing about it. Memories of that shocking moment when he'd walked in on Billy and Charlie together still haunted him at times, and he'd do anything to make sure the three of them were never in that position again, even push his brother out the door if that's what needed to happen. Plus, he loved Billy, truly and deeply, and the thought of getting to be the sole focus of his attention for a couple of days excited him.  
  
He threw Charlie's bag into the back of his SUV and nodded at Billy as he climbed into his own truck. "See you there," he called, waving as he slipped into the driver's seat. As soon as he'd backed the car out of the driveway, he reached over and placed his hand on Charlie's knee, offering him that simple contact as reassurance. "I love you, buddy," he said softly.  
  
"I love you, too, Don."  
  
"You'd better," Don commented, smiling broadly. The rest of the ride was quiet, Charlie staring out the window at the passing scenery, lost in his own thoughts.  
  
Billy was already up the stairs and in the apartment when they pulled into the parking lot, and Don could just picture him wandering around the space, picking up stray dishes and putting things in order. Cleaning was more nervous habit for him than regular activity, and he had to smile when they walked in and found Billy at the sink washing dishes.  
  
Don stepped behind him and pressed a kiss to his temple. "Hey."  
  
"Hey," Billy replied, tossing Don a smile. There were butterflies in his stomach just from having Don this close the ache to be alone with him was so bad. He took a deep breath and refocused on the caked on whatever was at the edge of this pan.  
  
"Leave that and come sit with us on the couch," Don entreated, wrapping his arms around Billy's waist.  
  
He turned his head to look at Charlie, who was still far too quiet for his tastes and watching them closely.  
  
"Yeah." Charlie reached out a hand. He really didn't want to be the one to break them apart, or to hurt them.  
  
Taking a deep breath, Billy took the offered hand. "Okay," he said, shutting the water off and walking with Charlie into the other room. Don followed, and together they settled Charlie into his favorite spot, nestled snugly between the two of them. Billy threaded a hand through Charlie's hair and lightly massaged his scalp, hoping to relax him, make him feel like this was just a normal night for the three of them.  
  
"When was the last time I told you you're beautiful?" Billy asked quietly.  
  
Charlie's eyes went blank for a moment as they turned inward. "Three days, 15 hours, and 33 minutes ago," he replied without a hint of self-consciousness.  
  
Laughing softly, Billy pressed a soft kiss to his lips. "You're beautiful. In every way."  
  
Charlie smiled, pleased. "And you're amazing," he said softly. "I love you, Billy. I hope--I hope you know that."  
  
"I do," Billy said, his hand moving from Charlie's scalp to the back of his neck. "And I know that we're going to miss you while you're gone, and we're going to be right here to welcome you back when you return."  
  
Don watched as Charlie's eyes started to droop a little from the magic Billy's fingers were working, and he snuggled closer, wrapping himself around Charlie, with one hand on Billy's knee.  
  
Charlie closed his eyes and tried to take comfort from the presence of the two people he loved most.  
  
They talked softly together, low murmuring words about nothing passing between them until Charlie yawned wide and rested his head against Billy's chest.  
  
"Come on," Don said, patting him on the back, "let's get into bed. You've got to be at the airport early tomorrow."  
  
"You gonna drive me?" he asked sleepily.  
  
"We both will," Don said, looking at Billy for confirmation.  
  
Billy nodded, the butterflies starting in his stomach again. That meant once they'd dropped Charlie off, he and Don would be alone in the car, which had always been their favorite times to tease and torment each other. Tomorrow had all the elements of one long-ass day.  
  
....  
  
Charlie slept restlessly, waking several times during the night to reassure himself that Don and Billy were both still present.  
  
Finally, Don wrapped his arms tightly around Charlie, doing his best to encourage him to lie still. He soon felt Billy do the same and after a long moment, all he heard was a contented sigh from between them. Glancing at the clock, he sighed inwardly. At least the three of them would get a good solid hour of rest before they would have to cajole Charlie out of bed and to the airport.  
  
....  
  
Charlie groaned when the alarm went off, but for once he didn't fight it. He got out of bed and stumbled into the shower, hoping the hot water would revive him a little.  
  
Stirring, Billy blinked when he heard the door to the bathroom shut and Don was still in bed. "Huh. The one time we don't have to use a crowbar to get him out of bed," he commented.  
  
Don chuckled and nodded. His eyes did a slow trip down Billy's body, the sheet giving him only a tantalizing view of the top of one hip. Billy's boxer shorts had a tendency to slip during sleep and he was almost always half out of them when he woke up. Don's fingers itched to pull the sheet aside, pull the boxers the rest of the way down and take him in his mouth. But he couldn't, even if there was enough time before taking Charlie to the airport, he couldn't. Eventually, he cleared his throat. "We should have dinner tonight, you and me."  
  
There was no way Billy could miss the hunger in Don's eyes and the way he couldn't seem to take his eyes off his hip. He blushed deeply, a little surprised at himself. "I'd like that."  
  
"Good. Should we have dinner here then?"  
  
"Hell yeah," Billy nearly growled. "I think I'd embarrass us both otherwise."  
  
Smiling, Don caressed Billy's cheek. "Well, we wouldn't want that." His eyes shifted over to Charlie, wet and dripping and wrapped in just a towel, and he smiled. "My turn in the shower."  
  
As he passed Charlie, he drew him into a long kiss, needing to get as much of him now as he could before he'd be without.  
  
Charlie quietly got dressed and shuffled into the kitchen to start the coffee.  
  
Billy watched this process closely, not sure if this was the normal laconic Charlie or if this was the brooding Charlie. He went out into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around Charlie, holding him close as they both watched the coffee start to brew.  
  
Charlie leaned back into Billy's embrace but remained quiet. He was trying not to think about what would happen after he left. He was trying not to think about anything.  
  
Deciding not to try to say anything that might send Charlie deeper into his head, Billy decided to just hold him and hope that his body was offering him some comfort. And when Don was dressed and out of the shower, they traded places. They were still quiet as Billy emerged from the bedroom and through most of the drive to the airport, the only sound one or the other of them taking a sip of coffee from their travel mugs and the low nameless music on the radio.  
  
Finally, unable to take the silence any more, Billy leaned into the gap between Don and Charlie. "So, Charlie. Tell me about this conference. It must be pretty prestigious if they're having you come talk."  
  
"I've already told you all about it," Charlie said a little sullenly.  
  
"Tell me again. I want to hear it." Billy figured if he could draw him into a conversation about his one other true love, that at least he could get Charlie talking and thinking about something other than him and Don.  
  
Charlie reiterated what he'd already said about the conference, his mind not really on the conversation. But he kept talking all the way to the airport, mainly so he didn't have to talk about anything else.  
  
"You can just drop me off in the unload zone," he said, as they approached the airport.  
  
"At least let us walk you inside."  
  
"Nah. You can't come past security and why pay for parking if you don't have to? Besides, you both have to get to work."  
  
Don exchanged a look with Billy as he pulled into the passenger-unloading zone.  
  
Charlie ruthlessly shoved all his feelings down and forced a smile, squeezing Don's shoulder and then reaching back awkwardly to squeeze Billy's knee. "You guys have fun," he said softly. "I mean that."  
  
"Thanks," Billy replied, just as softly, putting his hand on top of Charlie's and squeezing.  
  
They all got out of the car, Don circling around to the trunk and pulling out Charlie's bag. He placed it on the curb where Charlie was standing with Billy.  
  
"Enjoy the conference," Billy said, his hand on Charlie's shoulder, though all he really wanted to do was pull him in and kiss him.  
  
"We'll be right here to pick you up Sunday afternoon," Don said, stepping forward and taking Billy's place. He ducked his head until he got Charlie's eyes. "I'll see you soon."  
  
Charlie nodded and forced another smile. "See you Sunday." And he picked up his bag and headed into the terminal.  
  
Don and Billy watched him go as long as they could. "You know it's his imagination that's getting to him, right?" Billy said as they climbed back into the car.  
  
Sighing, Don nodded. "Don't know that I'd be any different, Coop."  
  
Billy clapped Don on the knee. "Come on, Eppes. Let's go to work."  
  
Charlie tried to focus on the presentation he'd be giving at the math conference, but all he could think about was Don and Billy. They wouldn't be doing anything yet, not unless they both skipped a day of work. But still. They'd be together, without him.  
  
Don couldn't help looking at the airport in his rear-view as it faded into the distance. He wondered what Charlie was thinking, and part of him wanted to just turn around and pick him up again, screw the conference. But he wanted to give Billy this time, and part of him needed it, too. He glanced at Billy shifting in his seat and tried to give him an encouraging smile.  
  
Rubbing his hands together, Billy tried to smile back, but he could feel it was tight. He had no idea what to do now that Charlie wasn't there. He itched to call in sick for both of them and take them back to his place, but he wondered if that was something Don still even wanted to do. "So... what did you want to have for dinner tonight?"  
  
Don took a deep breath and let it out. Charlie was an adult. He was going to take him at his word that he wanted them to have fun. There wasn't really anything he could do right now to reassure him anyway and he wanted this time with Billy. "You."  
  
Arousal slammed through Billy fast enough to make his head spin, and he almost made Don turn the car around and head to his place. Almost. He could feel himself blushing deeply and he coughed to cover it. "We can do that. But I think I'll order some Chinese food, too. Just for sustenance sake."  
  
He tentatively put his hand on Don's knee, not teasing, not really. "Thank you, Don. I know this can't be easy on you either. And I plan to show you just how much I appreciate it." Slowly, he slid his hand up, just an inch.  
  
"You know," Don said conversationally, "if you get us into an accident before we have a chance to have sex I will be very annoyed."  
  
Billy laughed, but he removed his hand so as not to tempt fate. "Well, we wouldn't want that," he commented with a grin. He couldn't help the flood of relief that went through him knowing that Don, at least part of Don, wanted this, too, that he wasn't doing it just to humor him. "So, if we're having me for dinner, does that mean you get to be dessert?"  
  
Don laughed. "If you like."  
  
"Definitely," Billy purred, licking his lips and looking at Don, finally feeling more relaxed and on familiar ground. Before he knew it though, they were pulling up at the FBI garage. Once the car was in park, he shifted in his seat and looked at Don, placing his hand on the side of his jaw. "I love you, Don. Have a good day. Try not to think too much about what I'm going to do to you when I get you home." He dropped Don a wink, grinning at him wickedly.  
  
Don laughed. "Maybe you should be more concerned about what _I'm_ going to do to _you_."  
  
Billy paused, waiting for the sound of Charlie's voice encouraging them. He loved it when they wrestled for dominance and was always the first to needle one or the other of them into it. It took him a moment to realize why it wasn't there, and when he did, he dropped his hand. "Guess we'll just have to wait and see. Come on, we'd better get inside before one of us does something really stupid."  
  
"Yeah." Don took a breath then forced Billy and Charlie out of his mind, slipping into work mode.  
  
Billy sat at his desk, one foot propped on a half-open drawer as he studied a file, hoping he looked nonchalant and busy, when the truth was he was neither. Don was just a few floors above him and now that they were a few hours away from finally being together, the itch under his skin for him grew persistent and annoying. And yet the absence of Charlie kept filtering into his brain. He hadn't realized quite how integral he was to their relationship, and it almost felt like he and Don were near strangers again.  
  
Don tried to focus on his work and not on his partner a few floors below him.  
  
The time when Charlie normally would have called to let him know he was safely on the ground came and went. A quick trip to the airline site showed the plane safely landed so either Charlie didn't want to interrupt his time with Billy or he was being passive aggressive and trying to punish them. Don sighed, suspecting it was the later. Well, he wasn't going to let it ruin his time with Billy.  
  
Finally, it was a few minutes to six, and Billy couldn't wait for Don to come down to him any more. He picked up the phone and dialed his extension, not bothering with preamble when he got the quick, "Eppes," he'd been expecting.  
  
"I'm hungry."  
  
"I'm absolutely starved."  
  
"I'll order Chinese, while you make your way down here, then," Billy said. He hung up the phone and then quickly dialed the Chinese place nearest his apartment, ignoring the butterflies that had started up again. It felt like there were at least twice as many as there had been before, and when he lifted his head a few minutes later to see Don coming down the row toward him, tight jeans and tight t-shirt and all, at least three of them flew right into his throat. "Ready to get out of here?" he managed to ask Don.  
  
"Absolutely," Don replied, fighting the urge to grin.  
  
Billy kept his hands to himself as they drove to pick up dinner. He was almost--nervous. Which was completely stupid. This was Don; he'd had sex with Don as recently as two days ago. But it was different, somehow, with Charlie gone.  
  
Don drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. He wanted to reach for Billy, tease him a little, but something felt strange and off. He'd been so consumed with Charlie for so long, it was like he didn't know how to behave without him around.  
  
The ride to pick up dinner and then to Billy's place was mostly quiet, neither of them really knowing what to say and both of them waiting for the other to say something. Up in Billy's kitchen, things weren't much better. They sat next to each other on stools at Billy's kitchen counter, Billy shaking his head at himself when he realized he'd also ordered Charlie's favorite. They ate in silence for a few long moments until Billy finally placed his fork down and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "This shouldn't be this hard," he said quietly.  
  
"No, it shouldn't," Don agreed. He hesitated, because he didn't want to hurt Billy, then said, "It feels a little like a betrayal. Of Charlie. I'm sorry. I know it's not, I do know that. But because we're not doing this in the heat of the moment..."  
  
"...we're both thinking too much. I know. I hadn't realized how important he'd become," Billy said, slipping his hand on top of Don's. "It's like I don't know you without him anymore. Which is all the more reason to do this. So, why don't we take our food into the living room, sit together on the couch and try to reacquaint ourselves with each other?" He turned and took both of Don's hands in his, and after a long moment of hesitation, he leaned in and pressed a soft, chaste kiss to his lips.  
  
"I think that's a good idea." Don returned Billy's kiss, deliberately adding a little more heat.  
  
Billy swept his tongue through Don's mouth once and then backed off, not wanting to push him. They were both going to have to come at this on their own terms. Collecting their cartons, they walked into the living room and sat on the couch pressed together hip to knee. In a more relaxed setting now, Billy asked Don about his day and they started chatting, the conversation getting easier as it went on. Eventually, Billy put his mostly empty carton on the table and slung his arm behind Don, his fingers running rhythmically through the short hair at the back of his head. "I like your hair short like this," he commented softly. "You should keep it this way."  
  
"Yeah? You like it all short and spiky? Harder to run your fingers through. Or pull," he said, grinning.  
  
"True," Billy agreed. "But, the way you start to shiver if I do this long enough more than compensates." He chuckled when his very next stroke up and down the back of Don's head made him shiver.  
  
"You are one hell of a sexy man, Don Eppes," he murmured, low and soft, his lips just a few inches from Don's.  
  
Don shivered again, though he tried to suppress it. He leaned forward and kissed Billy hungrily, tongue pushing against his mouth, demanding entrance.  
  
Grunting a little in surprise, Billy opened to Don, eagerly sucking on his tongue and then allowing him to do the same. One hand found Don's hip and he pulled, trying to get their bodies closer. "Don," he moaned when Don's lips found the side of his neck, nibbling lightly on sensitive places.  
  
"Bedroom?" Don whispered in his ear. "Or do you want me to fuck you here? On the couch? And every time you sit down here you'll think about it."  
  
"What makes you think you'll be doing the fucking, Eppes?" Billy challenged, still placing kisses to Don's jaw and neck, his hands caressing Don's side through his shirt. "I've waited a long time for this and I have every intention of making the most of it."  
  
One of Don's hands was tugging at his shirt, trying to get to his skin, and Billy pulled it off to pin it to the back of the couch.  
  
Don struggled and tried to free himself. "I'll fuck you, then you can fuck me."  
  
"You turning this into a negotiation?" Billy chuckled.  
  
"You did agree to be the main course," Don pointed out.  
  
Billy laughed. "I did at that. And I never break my promises." He released Don's wrist. Deep down, he had to wonder if this was what Don needed, to reclaim a little of the control over the situation before he could let himself receive the kind of pleasure he knew Billy, and Billy alone, could provide. "Let's get this fine ass into the bedroom then."  
  
"It is a _very_ fine ass," Don agreed. He wanted to keep moving forward, didn't want to give himself any time to think or he might start thinking about Charlie.  
  
Laughing again, Billy stood and then pulled Don up with him, kissing him as soon as he was upright and backing him into the bedroom. Hunger, deep and entrenched, welled up inside him and he started to pull at Don's clothes, needing to get to his skin. So long, for so long he'd wanted this, and he wasn't going to let anything stop them now. "Need you," Billy growled. "Need you so bad."  
  
"You've got me," Don said, placing biting kisses on Billy's neck. He quickly stripped Billy of his shirt and started to undo his pants.  
  
Don's shirt landed in a heap somewhere on the other side of the room before Billy set to work stripping his remaining clothes. Their hands bumped and they got tangled for a moment, but soon enough they were both completely naked and tumbling to the mattress, Don on top. The biting kisses moved from his neck to his chest, and he hissed at the heady combination of pleasure and pain. He pushed gently on Don's shoulder, getting him to lift his head and look him in the eyes for a moment. "I love you, Don," Billy murmured, low and breathless.  
  
"I love you too, Billy," Don said softly. He kissed Billy sweetly, tenderly.  
  
Relief flooded through Billy as he returned Don's kiss. He loved the fierceness and wild abandon he could give and get with Don, but he'd needed to know that under all the need and urgency Don still loved him. He let their kiss slide into something rougher and less elegant, filled with all the want and desire he had before he broke it off, his breathing harsh. "So, now that you have me like this, what did you plan on doing with me?" Billy teased.  
  
Don grinned. "If you wanted to hear me talk dirty to you, all you had to do was ask."  
  
"Really?" Billy said, also grinning. He arched up against Don, their cocks sliding across each other, making them both moan. "Talk to me, Don. Want you to tell me all the things you're going to do to me. Please."  
  
"Gonna turn you over. Gonna slide my fingers into you, slow. So slowly. Hit your prostate over and over until you beg me to slide inside you. Going to make you ask for what you want, Billy. Then I'm going to give it to you, hard and fast."  
  
Billy shuddered under Don, the pure, raw lust in his eyes making his breath hitch in his chest. "God, Don. Yes. Please."  
  
Don grinned and reached for the lube they kept by the bedside. "Turn over," he growled, already coating his fingers generously. "And spread 'em."  
  
"Yessir Agent Eppes," Billy said, rolling onto his front and shoving a pillow under his hips. He spread his legs, bent at the knees so his ass was up and presented eagerly for Don to do with as he pleased. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath, trying to quell the growing anticipation inside him. Fierce and needy as he'd been, Don was clearly still prepared to draw this out.  
  
Don kissed his left cheek then slowly slid the first finger in and then almost out.  
  
Gasping, Billy let his head drop forward, doing his best not to shift against the mattress. And that from just one of Don's fingers. His control was going to be in shreds by the time Don was totally inside him, he could tell. "Don," he moaned. "More. God, more, please."  
  
Don chuckled and after a moment added a second finger, crooking it just so.  
  
"Don!" Billy cried out, his hips shifting helplessly against the mattress, his body trying to get some relief for the aching need inside him. "Oh, fuck you are so gonna pay for this later," he said, trying to get control of his breathing again even as he pushed back on his fingers.  
  
Don laughed. "Unless I get you so wrung out on pleasure you can't retaliate." He crooked his fingers again and again.  
  
A low, continuous moan worked out of Billy's throat, the pleasure nearly wiping his ability for coherent thought. Deep in his heart he promised he'd repay Don for this. If not tonight, then tomorrow when they had all day together. He could be patient. For now, though, his heart was pounding in his chest and need was clawing at him, running along every nerve in his body.  
  
"Please!" he finally cried. "God fuck please please fuck me Don fuck _please_!"  
  
Dragging it out would be cruel so Don quickly slipped a third finger inside just long enough to make sure Billy was well and truly stretched before lining himself up and pushing in slowly and steadily.  
  
Don's focus and attention was heady, a nearly tangible thing, and he could feel it all around him, undivided by another person. "Mmm!" Billy moaned, pushing back and gasping at the pleasure that surged up his spine. "P-promised. Hard and fast. You promised," he panted.  
  
That was the sign he'd been waiting for. "So I did." His fingers curled around Billy's hips and he pushed hard and fast, relentlessly driving him higher and higher.  
  
Billy could only gasp and moan, his fingers twisted into the sheets as Don drove into him over and over. He could feel the familiar tightening at the base of his spine and he managed to growl Don's name, the only indication he could give for what needed.  
  
Don wrapped his hand around Billy's cock and stroked firmly.  
  
Helplessly, Billy's control snapped and pleasure unspooled at the base of his spine as he cried out and came all over Don's hand.  
  
Don soothed him with gentle pets and soft kisses, trying to hold off his own orgasm until Billy was recovered.  
  
Billy took a deep breath and pushed back against Don. "Don... come on, come for me," he murmured, his voice husky and ripped open with pure pleasure.  
  
Don groaned and came, calling Billy's name.  
  
Reaching back awkwardly, Billy stroked Don's skin as best as he could, waiting for him to come down enough for them both to stretch out on the bed.  
  
After a long few moments, Don pressed a kiss between his shoulder blades and gently extracted himself. His eyes were at half-mast when he turned his head to look at Billy.  
  
Smiling softly, Billy leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to Don's lips. "Hi."  
  
"Hi," Don replied, voice equally soft.  
  
The silence that settled around them was comfortable, and they draped their arms over one another easily. It was still strange not to have a body pressed firmly between them, and Billy couldn't help but think of Charlie. "I miss him," he said to Don eventually. "I am so glad we're doing this because I'd hate to be missing both of you right now," he hastened to add, "but I miss him a lot, too. What do you think he's up to?"  
  
"With any luck at all he's completely immersed in math and is busy telling everyone how it is."  
  
"But?"  
  
"But there's a good chance he's off somewhere sulking," he said, sighing.  
  
Billy lifted his head and placed his hand on Don's chest. "Don... do you regret this, spending this time with me?" He bit his lip, more than a little afraid of the answer.  
  
Don met Billy's gaze. "No," he said firmly. "We needed this."  
  
Billy nodded and put his head down again. "Charlie'll be okay. When he gets back he'll see that we haven't changed; we still need him, and it'll get easier."  
  
"I hope you're right," Don said, snuggling against Billy's body, his warmth making him drowsy and pulling him into sleep.  
  
....  
  
Charlie sat on his bed, alone in his hotel room, aimlessly flipping through channels. His notebooks and papers were strewn over the too-big mattress. He was supposed to be getting ready for his presentation tomorrow, but he couldn't focus.  
  
Don and Billy were all he could think about. He imagined what they were doing, what they were feeling. Imagined them trying to decide how to tell him that they'd been wrong. They'd still love him, Don especially, so they wouldn't want to hurt him, but...  
  
Part of him wondered if this is the way Billy'd felt before he'd moved to LA, when there were seemingly interminable months and miles between them. Had he obsessed over him and Don the way he was doing now? That fear and uncertainty must have been awful and he wrapped his arms around his knees.  
  
At least--at least he'd still have Don as his brother. But he wasn't sure how he'd deal with seeing them, knowing they were together without him; that they loved each other more than they loved him. How had Billy stood it?  
  
Absently, Charlie made a swift notation on his papers. That led to another notation, and another, and soon he was wrapping himself in a warm cocoon of math. The fear still niggled in the back of his mind and every now and then he'd find himself just staring at the blank wall, totally withdrawn, until the numbers floated up to him again. He worked this way until he literally fell asleep on top of his papers from sheer exhaustion.  
  
....  
  
Don dozed, waking to hot, wet suction on his cock.  
  
"Fuck," he groaned, automatically reaching down to run his fingers through sleep-tangled curls, checking his momentary surprise when instead it was the familiar texture of Billy's hair. "Billy..."  
  
Billy grinned and echoed Don's moan before increasing the suction.  
  
"God... th-thought you wanted to fuck me," Don managed through the haze of sleep and pleasure.  
  
"'m getting there," Billy said, still sucking languidly. He had all the time in the world now, and he intended to torture Don as much as he could with slow, deep, passionate lovemaking.  
  
"Gonna make me pay, aren't you?"  
  
"Promised you I would," Billy said, dipping his head to suck one of Don's balls into his mouth. "And I always try to live up to my promises."  
  
Don groaned, fingers twisting in the sheets.  
  
Billy contented himself with licking and sucking, enjoying the way Don's groans slowly progressed into whimpers and barely contained gasps. His hands teased at sensitive places, Don's hips and the backs of his knees, determined that Don was going to beg a little before he did anything else.  
  
The pleasure and pressure were intense. "Billy!" he gasped. "God, _please_!"  
  
Smirking, Billy backed off and started to kiss his way up Don's body. "Please, what Donnie?" he purred, rubbing obscenely against him. "What is it, exactly, that you want?"  
  
Don groaned, determined not to beg as much as Charlie would have. "Your cock, in me."  
  
"That's all?" Billy said, running his hand over Don's chest, tweaking a nipple. "There's so much I could do once I was inside you."  
  
Don rolled his eyes even as he gasped. "Fuck me," he said, his voice just edging on plaintive. "Slow."  
  
"Slow, huh? Slow and teasing? Till you beg me to go faster, to go harder?"  
  
"God, yes. Billy... please," Don said, the feel of Billy's body on top of him making desire rush through his veins.  
  
"Try pretty please," Billy said huskily.  
  
"Oh you evil bastard," Don groaned. "I'll get you for this." He took a deep breath. "Pretty please, Billy. Wanna feel you. Please."  
  
Billy grinned. "Payback is a bitch, Eppes." But he reached out and tenderly stroked Don's cheek as he said it.  
  
Turning his head, Don kissed the inside of Billy's wrist as he chuckled. "Please," he murmured. "Want you, Billy."  
  
Billy nodded, leaning down to kiss Don, deep and passionate, before breaking off enough to grab the lubricant and slick his fingers. He propped one of Don's legs on his shoulder and dropped his hand to his ass, teasing at the cleft before letting one finger slip inside.  
  
He made sure the first finger slid easily in and out before he added a second, crooking it to press lightly against Don's prostate.  
  
"Billy!" Don cried, his body arching.  
  
"Easy, Don," Billy soothed, kissing the inside of his knee. "I've got you." He pressed his fingers a little more firmly against Don's prostate, earning a low moan, and then scissored his fingers a little before adding a third. Satisfied that Don was well prepped, he lined himself up and pushed steadily inside, the tight familiar heat making him gasp in pleasure.  
  
He thrust slowly, making good on his promise to draw it out.  
  
Don moaned, low and deep in his throat, the feel of Billy inside him so good, but not nearly enough. He held his breath and counted to 10, trying to calm himself and let Billy take his payback. And then he did it again. But the pleasure simply overwhelmed his control and need settled in the pit of his stomach. "Billy... god, so good. Please. More, please," he murmured, breathless and panting.  
  
Billy smiled and increased his pace just a little.  
  
Frustrated, Don whined, reaching up and pulling Billy in as close as possible. He nipped at his neck, growling, "Need you. God. Need all of you. Please."  
  
Billy relented and upped his pace, thrusting harder and faster. He wrapped his hand around Don's cock, stroking in time to his urgent thrusts as he battled back his own orgasm, determined that Don would come first.  
  
Don tried to hold on but then he was shuddering, groaning Billy's name as he came.  
  
"Don!" Billy cried, momentarily overcome by Don's orgasm. Then he was thrusting sharply twice more and tipping over the edge with a long moan. "Don," he murmured, softer now, coming down off the wave of his orgasm. He slipped out of Don's body gently and stretched out next to him on the mattress. "You."  
  
"You," Don murmured back. He yawned and pulled Billy tight. "Mine."  
  
"All yours," Billy agreed, pressing a kiss to Don's shoulder. They both slipped into sound, satiated sleep.  
  
....  
  
They barely left Billy's apartment all day on Saturday, except to go for a run together and grab some coffee. The day passed easily, slow and pleasant, making love or just tangling up in each other on the couch to watch movies and eat. Don got quiet as the night wore on and they eventually slipped into bed to sleep.  
  
"Ready to have Charlie home?" Billy asked lightly.  
  
"He hasn't called."  
  
Billy kissed Don softly. "He's probably too buried in the math to come up for air long enough. Or he doesn't want to interrupt us." He thought for a second. "Or... he's punishing us."  
  
"Yeah," Don said, running a hand through his hair. "I just--I wish he'd trust me more, trust _us_ more than that. I don't know what else to do to show him I can't live without him."  
  
Billy hesitated, then said quietly, "There may be nothing more you _can_ do. Some things he just has to work out for himself."  
  
"Come here," he said, pulling Don closer. "Tomorrow we'll go pick Charlie up and as soon as we get back here we'll kiss all his doubts away. And if kissing doesn't work, we'll fuck him until he believes us."  
  
"I doubt he'll be in the mood for that. In fact, I expect him to call and try to weasel out of us picking him up tomorrow."  
  
Billy took a deep breath, doing his best not to answer sharply. "I know he's scared of losing us, but we just can't win. Talking about it won't help, and even if we don't let him think, just sandwich him between us and kiss him until his brain goes off line, I'm afraid he'll think it's just preamble to us saying goodbye. As long as he's waiting for the other shoe to drop we'll be stuck. And I refuse to feel guilty about this, Don. And you shouldn't either."  
  
Don's jaw clenched but he remained silent. He knew Charlie was acting like a child. But his instinctive response was still to defend him. Billy was right, but Charlie was scared, and Don felt caught in the middle.  
  
Billy ran his hands over Don's brow and jaw, trying to get him to relax again. "Look, you know I love Charlie deeply. And I don't think I'm the only one getting tired of talking ourselves around in circles on this. Can't big brother persuade baby brother to find a way to suck it up and deal with it? It can be done. I know from personal experience," he said, keeping his voice calm and soft.  
  
"I don't want to fight with you."  
  
"I don't want to fight with you, either, especially on our last night together," he said, running his hand soothingly down Don's side. "You know Charlie best, and I trust that if something needs to be said or done, you'll know what and when. I just want us all to be happy."  
  
"I think you're overestimating my ability to deal with Charlie." He sighed and tried to force it all to the back of his mind. He wanted to enjoy his time with Billy and be focused on Billy, not Charlie.  
  
"I love you," Billy said softly, nuzzling into Don. "Whatever happens next, I don't see that changing."  
  
"I love you, too. And I don't see that changing." He held Billy tightly and kissed the top of his head.  
  
Billy smiled and held Don as tight as he could, clinging to him if he were going to be honest. "Let's let tomorrow take care of tomorrow. You never know, Charlie could surprise us and be more okay than we think."  
  
Deep down he knew it was just wishful thinking, that it was much more likely that Charlie would be deeply not okay come tomorrow, but this is what he did when he just didn't know what else to do. He was pretty sure that Megan would call it denial.  
  
"Okay." Don continued to hold Billy tightly, occasionally pressing a kiss into his hair.  
  
He sighed and just let himself enjoy the contact with Don, eventually the both of them drifting off into restless sleep. Billy's dreams were dark and disturbing, populated with images of being trapped, being cut off, and being lost. When he woke to the sunlit room, he still couldn't quite shake the feelings those dreams had produced. He snuggled into Don again, hoping that the warmth of his body would help chase them away.  
  
"Hey. You okay?" Don murmured.  
  
Billy shrugged. "I have a bad feeling about today is all," he said. "I'm glad Charlie's coming home, I really am. I just--I miss the Imp."  
  
"Instead of the sullen brat?" Don asked quietly, carding his fingers through Billy's hair.  
  
Billy's eyebrows went up, but he nodded. "Your words, Donnie. Not mine." They were silent for a few moments until Billy finally asked. "What time does his plane land?"  
  
Checking the clock by the bed, Don said, "In a few hours."  
  
"Come on then," he said, pushing his way out of bed. "I know a great place to get a big breakfast by the airport. If he calls and tries to weasel out of us picking him up, it'll be too late because we'll already be there."  
  
"Okay." He reached out and touched Billy's arm. "I do know he can be a real pain and I'm sorry."  
  
Billy leaned in and claimed Don's lips in a long, deep kiss. "It's okay. Even when he's being a brat I still love him. And you. We'll work it all out one way or another. I'm sure of it."  
  
Don smiled and tried to relax. "Come on. I'm starving."  
  
They got dressed quietly and Billy drove to the restaurant. He wanted Don to be free to climb into the back seat with Charlie if he wanted to. They ate and talked about nothing in particular. Around 20 minutes before Charlie's plane was due to be at the gate, while they were just finishing paying their bill and getting ready to head over to the airport, Don's phone rang.  
  
He picked it up and looked at the caller ID. "Charlie," he said to Billy, flipping the phone open. "Hey, buddy! Welcome home," he answered.  
  
"Hey. The plane was a little early. Are you guys still coming to pick me up?"  
  
"We're like 5 minutes away, just finishing up a late breakfast," Don said. "Are you at the terminal?"  
  
"Still taxiing there. Should be at the gate in a few minutes."  
  
"We'll be there before you can even grab your bags," Don promised. "Hey... I missed you. I'm really glad you're home."  
  
"I missed you, too. Did-did you guys have a good time though?"  
  
"We did," Don said, putting his hand on Billy's knee as he started the car. "Wasn't quite the same without you, though. We'll talk about it more when we see you." Which was Don's way of making sure Charlie didn't say too much in public. "We'll be waiting for you in Baggage Claim, okay?"  
  
"Say hi to Billy for me."  
  
"I will." Don hung up the phone and slipped it back onto his belt. "He says hi. He sounds... well, he sounds like he's trying."  
  
Billy glanced at Don and squeezed his knee. "I can handle trying."  
  
....  
They pulled up to the terminal and Billy parked the car in short-term parking. They found the right baggage carousel for Charlie's flight and waited to catch sight of the familiar head of curls. "There he is," Billy said, pointing about halfway up the escalator as Charlie drifted into view.  
  
"Charlie!" Don called, waving to get his brother's attention. He grinned wide, his heart leaping at the sight of him, though he didn't miss how tired he looked.  
  
Charlie walked over and gave both Don and Billy a brief smile. "Hi."  
  
Don pulled Charlie in, hugging him as tight as possible because he couldn't kiss him. He inhaled, breathing in his familiar scent and enjoying the feel of him in his arms again. "I am so happy to see you," he whispered in Charlie's ear.  
  
Billy patted Charlie on the shoulder, not wanting to pull them apart. "It's good to see you. You and Don stay here. I'll get the bags." He worked his way next to the carousel, waiting for Charlie's bags to come into view."  
  
Charlie held Don tightly, swallowing against the sudden lump in his throat.  
  
Reluctantly, Don pulled away, aware he'd been holding Charlie for too long and always cautious about being in public. You never knew who could see. He did keep one hand on Charlie's arm. "How was your flight?"  
  
Billy reappeared with the bags before Charlie could answer and he handed them to Don. "My turn," he said with a grin, pulling Charlie into a big bear hug.  
  
Charlie returned the hug, holding Billy tight before stepping away.  
  
"Come on," Don said, handing one of Charlie's bags back to Billy to carry. "Let's get you back to the house." He wrapped his arm around Charlie's shoulder and guided him out of the airport and over to the car.  
  
They chatted lightly on the way over to the Eppes family home. Don and Billy shared more than one worried glance when even asking about the conference failed to get Charlie really talking. Most of his answers to their questions were short and lacking enthusiasm. Once they were in the driveway, Billy got out and pulled out the bags.  
  
"I'm going to take off," he announced. "I have some things I want to get done before Monday and Charlie here looks like he needs some rest. If you two want to come by later, feel free. If not, I'll catch up with you tomorrow."  
  
Don smiled. "Thanks, buddy," he leaned in and gave him a quick hug. He turned to Charlie. "What do you say after we get you unpacked we go over to my place for a while?"  
  
"Sure. That sounds good." He was tired, and he wanted to try and be mature, to pretend like everything was fine, but he knew he was failing.  
  
Don took him into the house and followed him around as he looked at his mail. There was a note on the fridge from Dad that he had to run out and welcoming Charlie home. As soon as he was sure Dad wasn't coming home any time soon, Don grabbed Charlie by the shoulders and kissed him deeply. "I know you're struggling, and I love you so much for trying. We'll go back to my place, talk, what ever you need, okay? We'll work it out."  
  
"Okay. I'm sorry. I am trying I'm just--tired."  
  
"I know, buddy," Don said gently.  
  
They unpacked as quickly as possible and then he drove Charlie's car over to his place. He grabbed a couple bottles of water and a snack, bringing it out to the living room and making Charlie comfortable on the couch. He wrapped an arm around his shoulders and urged him to lean against his body. He decided not to push. If Charlie wanted to talk, he would. Don was more than happy to have him take a nap just where he was.  
  
Charlie tried to just relax against Don. He wasn't ready to talk yet and he wanted to be clear headed when they finally discussed what had happened in his absence.  
  
They both woke with a start a few hours later to the sound of Don's phone ringing. "Sorry," Don murmured as he shifted Charlie to answer it. "Yeah, Eppes. Whoa, whoa slow down, Megan... what are you talking about? Special assignment? What--? Oh you've got to be kidding me. When? Yeah. Yeah, okay." He hung up the phone and barely resisted tossing it across the room. "Fuck."  
  
"What's wrong?" Charlie asked quietly.  
  
"Fucking... the whole team is being sent on a training assignment for a week." He looked at Charlie. "Starting tomorrow. Some bullshit surprise thing. This is so fucking unfair. I just got you back and now I'm being sent away."  
  
Charlie grimaced, fighting down his disappointment. "That sucks."  
  
Taking a deep breath and trying to control his anger, Don nodded. "I am so sorry, buddy. I know we have stuff we need to talk about. But at least you and Billy will have some time together, time to really get to know him." He crouched down next to Charlie, giving him a look that was both hopeful and pleading for forgiveness.  
  
"Hey. I know it's not your fault."  
  
"I just hate feeling like I'm running out on you," he said. He checked his watch. "I had better call Billy and let him know what's happening. Then I should pack. Will you stay with me?"  
  
"Sure. As long as you don't mind if I fall asleep. I haven't slept well the last few days. Not in a familiar bed, you know?"  
  
Don knew it was more than the unfamiliar bed that had kept Charlie from sleeping, but if Charlie wasn't going to say anything, then neither was he right now. "I don't mind. I'll just give Billy a quick call and I'll be there in a minute."  
  
As soon as he hung up the phone he went into the bedroom, finding Charlie sprawled across the mattress. Don watched him as he packed quietly and then slipped into bed behind him. He wrapped his arms securely around Charlie's waist, silently hoping to find a way to work everything out for the three of them. Because he liked his life the way it was and he didn't want it to change, but if it had to, as long as he had Charlie he'd be okay.  
  
....  
  
The next morning he woke obscenely early, even for him. He kissed Charlie's brow softly. "I have to go, but I'll call you. Promise me you'll spend some time with Billy, too, okay? He needs you just as much as I do."  
  
Charlie bit his lip, Don's words causing unexpected pain. "I promise."  
  
"Good," Don said, kissing him softly. "It--it'll all be okay. I'll be back in a week." He smoothed down his hair and then kissed him one last time. "Go back to sleep."  
  
Shouldering his bag, he took one more long look at Charlie, feeling deep down in his gut that they were at precipice. Where things were going to go from here, he had no idea. Quietly, he slipped from the bedroom and shut the door behind him.


End file.
